Dating Other Couples
夫妇二人行拓展交际圈
(1) 0ne of the many great things about being married or with a partner is not having to worry about meeting and dating new people-or so one might have thought. As Elizabeth Bernstein points out in her Bonds column in today's Personal Journal section, "couples dating" brings a whole new set of issues as the partners try to meet suitable friends.
(1)己婚或有固定伴侣的重要好处之一就是你再也不必为和陌生人见面约会而伤神了。或者说,你可能会这么以为。但正如伊丽莎白·伯恩斯坦 (Elizabeth Bernstein)在她的最新专栏文章中所指出来的那样,当你结婚后,你们夫妻二人与另外一对夫妇为交友而进行的“夫妻约会”将带来一系列全新的问题。
Take the experience of Ben Houten and his wife, who've "dated" an array of couples since moving to Grand Rapids, Mich.,three years ago: They had one "date" where the woman was self-absorbed, another, Mr. Van Houten recalls, where the man was "a complete dud with no sense of humor," and a third that was ruined by politics. When Mr. Van Houten got up his nerve and asked a neighbor and his wife out to dinner,the man replied,"I don't like people. "
伊丽莎白讲述了本·霍登夫妇的经历。当他们3年前刚刚搬到密歇根州大急流域时,他们二人"约会"了多对夫妻。霍登回忆道,在他们当中,有一对中的妻子一切以自我为中心,第二对中的那个丈夫是个十足的闷葫芦,一点儿幽默感都没有,第三对则被政治给毁了。还有一次霍登鼓足勇气约一对邻居夫妇外出就餐,那位丈夫的回答居然是“我不喜欢人。”
And the date, Elizabeth says, is merely where the stress begins. "Because what if they don't cal1? Should you contact them? And if you do, and you still don't hear back, what does that say about your relationship with your partner? Are you irritating? Insufferable? Uninteresting as a team?"
伊丽莎白说,这样的约会成了压力的开始。因为你总会想“如果他们不打电话怎么办?你是否应该联系他们?如果你联系了他们,却还是得不到回应,那么这对四人关系意味着什么呢?你们是不是会惹人讨厌,让人难以忍受?还是乏味的一对?”
(2) After reading Elizabeth's tales of couples who suffered through dates where a wife licked cheese off a knife, or where one spouse asked the other if it was time to "go sleepy in the beddie"-and if you think back to your own couples-date mishaps-your might wonder why it's worth it at all. But looking around at your group of friends,whom you no longer need to date,tells the story.
(2)读者还会在伊丽莎白的文章里看到有些夫妇在“约会”时行为不当,一位妻子舔掉了刀上的奶酶,还有一位丈夫则当众问太太现在是不是该“睡觉觉” 了;再联想自己交友经历中的糗事,你或许会自间经历这一切是否值得。但是看看你身边那些你无需去主动约会、已成为你朋友的人们,你就明白了其中价值。
"Research shows that couples who are friends with other couples have happier, longer-lasting relationships with each other," Elizabeth writes. The reasons are simple. If you have friends who enjoy you as a couple, you may feel better about your union. These other couples can be a support network. And the process of making new friends together may inject energy into your relationship and give you something to bond over.
伊丽莎白写道,调查显示,如果夫妻二人有其他夫妇为友,那么他们两者间的关系更快乐、更持久。她说原因很简单,因为如果有朋友接纳、欣赏你和你的伴侣,那么你会对自己的另一半感觉更好,这些小家庭之间可以构成一个支撑网 s而且夫妻共同的交友过程会给两人的关系注人能量,巩固你们的纽带。
My wife and I were fortunate to develop a great group of friends soon after moving to the suburbs six years ago. (3) 0ur initial couple's dates went so smoothly that I don't really remember them as dates, per se, and since the initial getting-to-know you phase we've become so close that we just booked a vacation house for next summer that five families will share (10 adults and 11 kids!).
在6年前搬到郊区居住后,我和我太太很幸运地结交了不少朋友。(3)起初,我们和其他夫妇的交往进展得非常顺利,以致于我几乎没把它们归结为“约会”。大家在经过了一开始的互相了解阶段后就打成了一片,我们5家人刚刚为明年夏天预订了度假屋,想想看,共有 10个成人、 11个孩子!
On the other hand, we've had some couples dates that didn't seem 10 take. A while back we had a great dinner at the home of a couple who were new to our church. We laughed, shared personal stories and seemingly bonded-the question was not whether we'd next get together, but when. The when turns out to be about two years and counting, and I'm not really sure why. Just one of those things.
另一方面,我们也有一些不了了之、彷佛从来不曾发生过的交友经历。我们曾经在一对新教友家中享用了一顿非常棒的晚餐。我们有说有笑、分享个人故事,似乎建立起了友谊,问题不是我们是否要再见面,而是什么时候再聚。可是到现在一晃两年过去了,我也不知道我们为什么再也没有了下文。这只是类似的事情之一。
What have your couples-dating experiences been like? Have you made good friends that way-or had some horror stories?
你们有试图和其他夫妇交友的经历吗?你们是不是由此找到了好朋友,或是有什么令人不快的故事?
四级句型讲解
1. One of the many great things about being married or with a partner is not having to worry about meeting and dating new people-or so one might have thought.
本句是一个or连接的并列复合句。第一句中is not having to worry about meeting and dating new people是第一句的谓语结构。
语法重点:分词短语作表语
2. After reading Elizabeth's tales of couples who. suffered through dates where a wife licked cheese off a knife, or where one spouse asked the otber if it was time to "go sleepy in the beddie"-and if you think back to your own couples-date mishaps-you might wonder why it's worth it at all.
本句是一个复合句。主句是you might wonder why it's worth it at all,其中包含了一个why引导的名词性从句,作wonder的宾语。who引导定语从句,修饰couples。其中两个where引导两个定语从句,修饰 dates。在第二个定语从句中, 1何|导的名词性从句作asked的直接宾语。第二个if引导条件状语从句。
语法重点:名词性从句,定语从句,条件状语从句
3. Our initial couple's pates went so smoothly that I don 't really remember them as dates, per se, and since the initial getting-to-know you phase we've become so close that we just booked a vacation house for next summer that five families will share (10 adu1ts and 11 kids!)
本句是一个复合句,主句是Our initial couple's dates went so smoothly。后面的that引导一个结果状语从句,与so相呼应。 phase后面 we've...share作phase的宾语。其中第一个that引导结果状语从句,与so相呼应,第二个that引导限制性定语从句,修饰a vacation house。
语法重点:结果状语从句,宾语从句,定语从句