作为马奇家卑微的家史作者,如果不奉献至少一个章节的篇幅给那两个最宝贝最重要的家庭成员,我会感到没有尽责。戴茜和戴米已经到了开窍的年龄,在这快节奏年代,三四岁的幼儿会坚持自己的权利,而且能如愿以偿,比许多大人都厉害。如果说曾经有一对双胞胎濒临被溺爱彻底宠坏的危险,那就是这两个牙牙学语的小布鲁克。当然他们是世上最出色孩子,有下面的事实为证。八个月的时候就会走路,十二个月就能流利地说话,两岁的时候,他们就在餐桌上有了席位,举止很得体,迷倒了所有的目睹者。三岁时,戴茜要做针线活,而且还真的缝出了一个有四道缝线的袋子。她还在餐具柜里干起了家务,娴熟地操纵起一个微型的炉灶,汉娜为之流出了骄傲的眼泪。戴米则跟外公学写字,外公发明了一种新的教学模式教字母,用手和脚形成字母,从而把头脑体操和脚跟体操结合了起来。这个男孩很早就显现了机械方面的天赋,这让他爸爸欣喜不已,却让他妈妈心烦意乱,因为他看到什么机械就去模仿,育儿室总是乱糟糟的。他的“缝纫七(机)”,是一个由绳子、椅子、晒衣夹和线轴组成的神秘结构,轮子就那么“转着转着”。还有,他在大椅子背后挂了一个篮子,把过于轻信的妹妹装在里面,往上拉,结果没成功。而这个有着女性献身精神的妹妹,居然听任自己的小脑袋被撞来撞去,直到获得解救。而这个小发明家却愤怒地说:“啊唷,妈——妈,大(那)是我的跳(吊)车,我想把她拉上来。”
这对双胞胎虽然性格迥然不同,但相处得非常好,很少有一天吵架超过三次的。当然戴米对戴茜专横跋扈,但总是勇敢地保护她免受其他人的侵犯。而戴茜则把自己变成了划船奴,她崇拜哥哥,认为他是世界上唯一的完人。她脸色红润、身体圆胖,有一颗阳光灿烂的小心灵。她很讨人喜欢,并且在每个人的心坎里安顿下来。她是那类生来就惹人去亲吻、去拥抱的迷人孩子,像个小仙女那样地被打扮着,被爱慕着,似乎生就是各种喜庆场合上的赞许对象。她的小美德很可爱,要不是活泼的天性中有点小淘气,她会是个十足的小天使。她的世界里都是晴空万里,每天早晨穿着小睡衣,爬上窗台观察,不管是下雨还是晴天,她总是说:“哦,和(好)天气,哦,和(好)天气!”在她眼里每个人都是朋友,她会很信任地去亲一个陌生人,连最乖僻的单身汉都会变得温和起来,喜欢孩子的人更是羡慕不已。
“囡囡爱每格(个)人。”有一次她这么说着,一手拿着勺子,一手拿着杯子,张开双臂,仿佛渴望着去拥抱和润泽整个世界。
看着她慢慢长大,她母亲开始感到,斑鸠房有幸居住了这么个安详又可爱的人儿,就像老房子曾经居住着一个让家人感到温暖的人儿一样,她祈祷自己免受类似的损失,这种损失最近让大家领悟了,他们长期以来不知不觉拥有着一个天使。外公经常叫她“贝丝”,外婆总是不知疲倦地看护着她,仿佛在设法弥补以往的某种过失,这个过失除了她自己没有人能看到。
戴米像个真正的美国佬,有追根究底的癖好,什么都想知道,老是问“为什么”,并经常为得不到满意的答复而恼火。
他也有哲学的爱好,这一点叫外公喜出望外,外公跟他进行苏格拉底式的交谈,早熟的学生偶尔还会难倒老师,而一旁的女眷们毫不掩饰得意的神情。
“是什么让我的腿走路,外东(公)? ”一天晚上被哄上床后,小哲学家问,若有所思地打量着自己那两条活动着的腿。
“是你的小脑袋,戴米。”圣人回答说,谦恭地抚摸着那满头金发的脑袋。
“什么是小脑太(袋)? ”
“它是某种指挥你身体行动的东西,就像手表里的发条使齿轮转动,我给你看过的。”
“帮我打开,我要看看它的转动。”
“你打不开手表,我打不开你的脑袋。上帝给你上了发条,你一直走着,直到有一天要你停下来。”
“是吗?”戴米汲取着新思想,棕色的眼睛瞪得又大又亮,“我像表一样上了发条?”
“是的,但是无法向你说明是如何上,因为上的时候我们没看到。”
戴米摸摸后背,仿佛要看看背部像不像手表,然后严肃地评论说:“我擦(猜),长(上)帝是在我睡觉的时候给我上的。”
接下来是外公仔细的解释,小家伙全神贯注地听着。一旁的外婆担忧地说:“亲爱的,你认为对孩子讲这些事情明智吗?他的额头上出现了隆起,会问出最难回答的问题的。”
“他的年龄,能提出问题,就能接受真实的答案。我没有往他的脑袋里灌输思想,而是帮助他解开已经在那里的问题。现在的孩子比我们聪明,我一点也不怀疑,他能听懂我对他说的每一个字。好了,戴米,告诉我,你把你的心灵放在哪里了?”
要是这个男孩像亚西比德[1]那样地回答说:“老天爷作证,苏格拉底,我说不出。”外公也不会感到奇怪。但是他像只沉思的幼鹳,单腿站立了一会儿,然后沉着肯定地回答说:“在我的小肚子里。”老先生只能跟着外婆笑起来,结束了这堂哲学课。
要不是戴米令人信服地证实了他既是萌芽的哲学家,也是真正的孩子,母亲会有理由焦虑的。哲学的讨论常常使汉娜不祥地点头预言说:“这孩子不会在这个世上长留。”好在他转身马上玩起恶作剧,这足以打消她的担忧。可爱的、糟糕的、淘气的捣蛋鬼们的胡闹,总是让父母亲悲喜交加。
美格制定了许多道德准则,并准备实施下去。但是,有哪一个母亲曾抵制住这些袖珍男女迷人的诡计、机灵的推诿、不声不响的放肆呢?他们还那么小,就表现出了机灵鬼[2]的才能。
“不能再吃葡萄干了,戴米,会生病的。”在葡萄干布丁节,妈妈对那个老是定期来帮厨的小大人说。
“我喜欢生病。”
“我不要你帮忙,走开,帮助戴茜做小馅饼去。”
他不情愿地离开了,但这个冤屈沉重地压在他的心头,不久昭雪的机会来了,他以精明的交易胜过了妈妈。
“好了,你们都很乖,现在你们喜欢玩什么,我就玩什么。”美格说着,把她的小帮厨带到楼上,此时布丁已经安全地进了锅子发酵。
“真的,妈——妈?”戴米问,一个绝妙的主意出现在他撒满了粉的脑袋里。
“真的,随你说吧。”母亲说话似乎太欠考虑。她心里准备着把《三只小猫》唱上个六七遍,或者不顾劳累把全家带去“买个便士小面包”。但戴米的冷静回答把她逼到了墙角:
“那么,我们去把所有的葡萄干都吃光。”
乔乔姨是两个孩子的主要玩伴和知心朋友,他们三个人把小屋子弄得乱七八糟。艾美姨对他们来说,还只是个名字,贝丝姨的愉快记忆不久就淡去了。但乔乔姨是活生生的现实,他们对她极为重视,有此恭维深深地感动了她。但是巴尔先生来了,乔疏远了玩伴,这两个小生灵感到沮丧和凄凉。喜欢到处兜售吻的戴茜失去了最佳顾客,破产了。戴米用稚嫩的眼睛观察,不久就发现,比起自己,乔乔姨更喜欢跟“熊人”玩。尽管受到了伤害,但他忍气吞声,因为没有勇气去羞辱这样一个对手。对方背心口袋里总是源源不断地产出巧克力豆,还有一只表可以从匣子里拿出来任凭热情的欣赏者摇晃。
有人会认为,这些讨人欢心的特许是贿赂,但戴米不是这么看,继续以若有所思的友好态度光顾这个“熊人”,而小戴茜在他第三次拜访时就喜欢上了他,认为他的肩膀是她的宝座,他的手臂是她的庇护所,他的礼物是极有价值的宝贝。
绅士们有时会心血来潮,喜欢起他们所仰慕的女士们的小亲戚来,但是这种假模假样爱小孩儿的表现与他们很不协调,一点儿也骗不了人。然而,巴尔先生对孩子的爱是真诚的,尽管同样奏效——在法律问题上诚实最是上策,爱的问题也一样。他是那种天生能跟小孩混熟的男人,当小脸蛋与他那张男子汉的脸形成愉快的对比时,他显得尤其可爱。他的事情,不管是什么事情,把他一天天地耽搁在这里,而且晚上也很少不来光顾的——嘿,他总是来找马奇先生,所以我以为是马奇先生吸引了他。这个优秀的爸爸为这个假象所迷惑,以为自己是有吸引力,扬扬得意地与这个同好进行长时间的交流,直到有一天,他那更具有观察力的外孙偶然的一句话,让他如梦初醒。
一天傍晚,巴尔先生来了,他在书房的门口停下,对眼前的情景感到惊讶。马奇先生躺在地上,尊贵的双腿翘起在空中,身边的戴米也趴着,用他那双穿着红色长袜的短腿,努力去模仿外公的姿势。这两个“五体投地”的人非常投入,没有意识到来了些观众,直到巴尔先生朗朗地笑出声来,大为不快的乔大叫起来:
“爸爸,爸爸,教授来了。”
一双黑腿放下来,白头抬起来。这位导师尊严依旧地说:“晚上好,巴尔先生。请稍等,我们就要完成功课了。来,戴米摆出这个字母,然后念出来。”
经过一些前仰后合的努力,那双红腿摆出了一只圆规的形状,然后这个聪明伶俐的学生凯旋般地说:“我认识!这是‘We(V)',外东(公),这是We! ”
“他生来就是个韦勒[3]。”乔笑着说。父亲起来了,外甥却要倒立,这是他庆祝放学的唯一表达方式。
“你今天都做了什么了,bübchen[4]? ”巴尔先生拉起这个体操运动员问。
“我去看过小玛丽了。”
“在那里做了什么?”
“吻了她。”戴米毫不掩饰地回答。
“呸!汝开始得太早了。那个小玛丽怎么说?”巴尔先生问,继续要小罪人忏悔,后者正站在他的膝盖上探索马甲背心的口袋。
“噢,她喜欢,她也吻了我,我也喜欢。难道小男孩不是喜欢小女孩的?”戴米问,他嘴巴塞得满满的,一副满足的样子。
“这只早熟的小鸡!是谁把这塞到你的脑袋里的?”乔问。她和教授一样欣赏这天真无瑕的坦白。
“不是在脑袋里,是在嘴里。”抠字眼的戴米回答说。他伸出舌头,上面有颗巧克力糖,以为乔指的是糖果,而不是思想。
“你应该省下一些送给那个小朋友。甜糖送甜心,小达(大)人。”巴尔先生递给乔一些巧克力豆,脸上的表情让她纳闷,巧克力是不是众神饮用的美酒。戴米也看到了他的微笑,深受触动,他直通通地问:
“大男孩也喜欢大女孩吗,家(教)授?? ”
巴尔先生和小华盛顿[5]一样不会说谎,所以含含糊糊地回答说,依他看,有时候是这样的。那说话的口气使马奇先生放下手里的衣服刷,扫视一眼乔那腼腆的脸庞,然后一屁股坐到椅子上,仿佛那只“早熟的小鸡”把一种思想塞进了他的脑袋,这种滋味甜甜的、酸酸的。
半小时后,乔在瓷器橱里抓到了戴米,她没有因为他钻进来而推搡他,而是亲热地搂抱他,几乎让这小身体窒息。为什么乔乔姨在这异常的举动后,还意想不到地赏给他一大片面包和果冻?这个问题一直困扰着小脑袋,最后被迫让它悬着,永远不去解答。
* * *
[1]雅典政治家(前450—前404)。
[2]狄更斯小说《雾都孤儿》人物,小偷头目。
[3]狄更斯小说人物,惯于在引用名言后加上滑稽动作。
[4]德语,小伙子。
[5]美国开国总统华盛顿从小就不说谎。
I CANNOT FEEL that I have done my duty as humble historian of the March family, without devoting at least one chapter to the two most precious and important members of it. Daisy and Demi had now arrived at years of discretion; for in this fast age babies of three or four assert their rights, and get them, too, which is more than many of their elders do. If there ever were a pair of twins in danger of being utterly spoiled by adoration, it was these prattling Brookes. Of course they were the most remarkable children ever born, as will be shown when I mention that they walked at eight months, talked fluently at twelve months, and at two years they took their places at table, and behaved with a propriety which charmed all beholders. At three, Daisy demanded a “needler”, and actually made a bag with four stitches in it; she likewise set up housekeeping in the sideboard, and managed a microscopic cooking stove with a skill that brought tears of pride to Hannah's eyes, while Demi learned his letters with his grandfather, who invented a new mode of teaching the alphabet by forming letters with his arms and legs, thus uniting gymnastics for head and heels. The boy early developed a mechanical genius which delighted his father and distracted his mother, for he tried to imitate every machine he saw, and kept the nursery in a chaotic condition, with his “sewin-sheen”—a mysterious structure of string, chairs, clothespins, and spools, for wheels to go “wound and wound”; also a basket hung over the back of a chair, in which he vainly tried to hoist his too confiding sister, who, with feminine devotion, allowed her little head to be bumped till rescued, when the young inventor indignantly remarked, “Why, Marmar, dat's my lellywaiter, and me's trying to pull her up.”
Though utterly unlike in character, the twins got on remarkably well together, and seldom quarreled more than thrice a day. Of course, Demi tyrannized over Daisy, and gallantly defended her from every other aggressor, while Daisy made a galley slave of herself, and adored her brother as the one perfect being in the world. A rosy, chubby, sunshiny little soul was Daisy, who found her way to everybody's heart, and nestled there.One of the captivating children, who seem made to be kissed and cuddled, adorned and adored like little goddesses, and produced for general approval on all festive occasions. Her small virtues were so sweet that she would have been quite angelic if a few small naughtinesses had not kept her delightfully human. It was all fair weather in her world, and every morning she scrambled up to the window in her little nightgown to look out, and say, no matter whether it rained or shone, “Oh, pitty day, oh, pitty day! ”Everyone was a friend, and she offered kisses to a stranger so confidingly that the most inveterate bachelor relented, and baby-lovers became faithful worshipers.
“Me loves everybody, ” she once said, opening her arms, with her spoon in one hand, and her mug in the other, as if eager to embrace and nourish the whole world.
As she grew, her mother began to feel that the Dovecote would be blessed by the presence of an inmate as serene and loving as that which had helped to make the old house home, and to pray that she might be spared a loss like that which had lately taught them how long they had entertained an angel unawares. Her grandfather often called her “Beth”, and her grandmother watched over her with untiring devotion, as if trying to atone for some past mistake, which no eye but her own could see.
Demi, like a true Yankee, was of an inquiring turn, wanting to know everything, and often getting much disturbed because he could not get satisfactory answers to his perpetual “What for? ”
He also possessed a philosophic bent, to the great delight of his grandfather, who used to hold Socratic conversations with him, in which the precocious pupil occasionally posed his teacher, to the undisguised satisfaction of the womenfolk.
“What makes my legs go, Dranpa? ” asked the young philosopher, surveying those active portions of his frame with a meditative air, while resting after a go-to-bed frolic one night.
“It's your little mind, Demi, ” replied the sage, stroking the yellow head respectfully.
“What is a little mine? ”
“It is something which makes your body move, as the spring made the wheels go in my watch when I showed it to you.”
“Open me. I want to see it go wound.”
“I can't do that any more than you could open the watch. God winds you up, and you go till He stops you.”
“Does I? ” And Demi's brown eyes grew big and bright as he took in the new thought. “Is I wounded up like the watch? ”
“Yes, but I can't show you how, for it is done when we don't see.”
Demi felt his back, as if expecting to find it like that of the watch, and then gravely remarked, “I dess Dod does it when I's asleep.”
A careful explanation followed, to which he listened so attentively that his anxious grandmother said, “My dear, do you think it wise to talk about such things to that baby? He's getting great bumps over his eyes, and learning to ask the most unanswerable questions.”
“If he is old enough to ask the question he is old enough to receive true answers. I am not putting the thoughts into his head, but helping him unfold those already there. These children are wiser than we are, and I have no doubt the boy understands every word I have said to him. Now, Demi, tell me where you keep your mind.”
If the boy had replied like Alcibiades, “By the gods, Socrates, I cannot tell, ” his grandfather would not have been surprised; but when, after standing a moment on one leg, like a meditative young stork, he answered, in a tone of calm conviction, “In my little belly, ” the old gentleman could only join in Grandma's laugh, and dismiss the class in metaphysics.
There might have been cause for maternal anxiety, if Demi had not given convincing proofs that he was a true boy, as well as a budding philosopher; for, often, after a discussion which caused Hannah to prophesy, with ominous nods, “That child ain't long for this world, ” he would turn about and set her fears at rest by some of the pranks with which dear, dirty, naughty little rascals distract and delight their parents' souls.
Meg made many moral rules, and tried to keep them, but what mother was ever proof against the winning wiles, the ingenious evasions, or the tranquil audacity of the miniature men and women who so early show themselves accomplished Artful Dodgers?
“No more raisins, Demi. They'll make you sick, ” says Mamma to the young person who offers his services in the kitchen with unfailing regularity on plum-pudding day.
“Me likes to be sick.”
“I don't want to have you, so run away and help Daisy make patty cakes.”
He reluctantly departs, but his wrongs weigh upon his spirit, and by-and-by when an opportunity comes to redress them, he outwits Mamma by a shrewd bargain.
“Now you have been good children, and I'll play anything you like, ”says Meg, as she leads her assistant cooks upstairs, when the pudding is safely bouncing in the pot.
“Truly, Marmar? ” asks Demi, with a brilliant idea in his well-powdered head.
“Yes, truly; anything you say, ” replies the shortsighted parent, preparing herself to sing “The Three Little Kittens” half a dozen times over, or to take her family to “Buy a penny bun, ” regardless of wind or limb. But Demi corners her by the cool reply—
“Then we'll go and eat up all the raisins.”
Aunt Dodo was chief playmate and confidante of both children, and the trio turned the little house topsy-turvy. Aunt Amy was as yet only a name to them, Aunt Beth soon faded into a pleasantly vague memory, but Aunt Dodo was a living reality, and they made the most of her, for which compliment she was deeply grateful. But when Mr. Bhaer came, Jo neglected her playfellows, and dismay and desolation fell upon their little souls. Daisy, who was fond of going about peddling kisses, lost her best customer and became bankrupt; Demi, with infantile penetration, soon discovered that Dodo like to play with “the bear-man” better than she did him; but, though hurt, he concealed his anguish, for he hadn't the heart to insult a rival who kept a mine of chocolate drops in his waistcoat pocket, and a watch that could be taken out of its case and freely shaken by ardent admirers.
Some persons might have considered these pleasing liberties as bribes;but Demi didn't see it in that light, and continued to patronize the “the bear-man” with pensive affability, while Daisy bestowed her small affections upon him at the third call, and considered his shoulder her throne, his arm her refuge, his gifts treasures of surpassing worth.
Gentlemen are sometimes seized with sudden fits of admiration for the young relatives of ladies whom they honor with their regard; but this counterfeit philoprogenitiveness sits uneasily upon them, and does not deceive anybody a particle. Mr. Bhaer's devotion was sincere, however likewise effective—for honesty is the best policy in love as in law; he was one of the men who are at home with children, and looked particularly well when little faces made a pleasant contrast with his manly one. His business,whatever it was, detained him from day to day, but evening seldom failed to bring him out to see—well, he always asked for Mr. March, so I suppose he was the attraction.The excellent papa labored under the delusion that he was, and reveled in long discussions with the kindred spirit, till a chance remark of his more observing grandson suddenly enlightened him.
Mr. Bhaer came in one evening to pause on the threshold of the study, astonished by the spectacle that met his eye. Prone upon the floor lay Mr. March, with his respectable legs in the air, and beside him, likewise prone, was Demi, trying to imitate the attitude with his own short, scarlet-stockinged legs, both grovelers so seriously absorbed that they were unconscious of spectators, till Mr. Bhaer laughed his sonorous laugh, and Jo cried out, with a scandalized face—
“Father, Father, here's the Professor! ”
Down went the black legs and up came the gray head, as the preceptor said, with undisturbed dignity, “Good evening, Mr. Bhaer. Excuse me for a moment. We are just finishing our lesson. Now, Demi, make the letter and tell its name.”
“I knows him! ” And, after a few convulsive efforts, the red legs took the shape of a pair of compasses, and the intelligent pupil triumphantly shouted, “It's a We, Dranpa, it's a We! ”
“He's a born Weller, ” laughed Jo, as her parent gathered himself up, and her nephew tried to stand on his head, as the only mode of expressing his satisfaction that school was over.
“What have you been at today,bübchen? ”asked Mr.Bhaer,picking up the gymnast.
“Me went to see little Mary.”
“And what did you there? ”
“I kissed her, ” began Demi, with artless frankness.
“Prut! Thou beginnest early. What did the little Mary say to that? ”asked Mr. Bhaer, continuing to confess the young sinner, who stood upon the knee, exploring the waistcoat pocket.
“Oh,she liked it,and she kissed me,and I liked it.Don't little boys like little girls? ” asked Demi, with his mouth full, and an air of bland satisfaction.
“You precious chick! Who put that into your head? ” said Jo, enjoying the innocent revelation as much as the Professor.
“'Tisn't in mine head, it's in mine mouf, ” answered literal Demi,putting out his tongue, with a chocolate drop on it, thinking she alluded to confectionery, not ideas.
“Thou shouldst save some for the little friend: sweets to the sweet, mannling.” And Mr. Bhaer offered Jo some, with a look that made her wonder if chocolate was not the nectar drunk by the gods. Demi also saw the smile, was impressed by it, and artlessy inquired—
“Do great boys like great girls, too, 'Fessor? ”
Like young Washington, Mr. Bhaer “couldn't tell a lie, ” so he gave the somewhat vague reply that he believed they did sometimes, in a tone that made Mr. March put down his clothesbrush, glance at Jo's retiring face, and then sink into his chair, looking as if the ‘precocious chick' had put an idea into his head that was both sweet and sour.
Why Dodo, when she caught him in the china closet half an hour afterward, nearly squeezed the breath out of his little body with a tender embrace, instead of shaking him for being there, and why she followed up this novel performance by the unexpected gift of a big slice of bread and jelly, remained one of the problems over which Demi puzzled his small wits, and was forced to leave unsolved forever.